Sickness

Hello there! It’s been a while hasn’t it?

This is just a post to let you know why I haven’t blogged in a while…for those who were wondering.

I’ve been sick on and off throughout 2014 but I sort of ignored it being the hard headed person that I am. Then the peak came last October. My bags were packed but I wasn’t going to the train station or the airport as per usual. My documents were ready but they weren’t filled with my passport and travel notebook. I was going to the one destination that I never wanted to go, a destination that I absolutely hate : the hospital.

I have a big phobia towards needles due to an experience I had when I was small. I hate the smell of hospital. Nurses and doctors are scary for me. Every time I come to the hospital for doctor check ups, it gives me the shiver. And now I have to stay in one due to my illness. I stayed for 5 days last October.

After getting out, instead of getting better, I got worse. So this January I was hospitalized again (at a different hospital, should I do a hospital review now? Hah!)…for 2 weeks! I have never even stayed at a hotel for that long! While I feel uncomfortable letting you know the details of my illness (no offence), let me just say that it is quite serious. I have always felt healthy all my life and have never been hospitalized so this was really scary for me.

I realized though during my stay that I learned a few things about myself and life all around. Pretty much all my life I have always felt independent and that I can do and eat pretty much everything I want. Now being ill I have to rely on so many people and follow certain rules – and that was really hard to swallow for me.

It turns out…

I wasn’t scared of being in a foreign country by myself. I was more scared of being in a room full of people with medicines, needles and IV fluid.

I wasn’t scared of having bruises from falling down in a cobble stone street. I was more scared of bruises left by IV needles and blood tests.

I wasn’t scared of not having a plan for travel. I was more scared of having an unknown future. When will I get better? Is it too soon to make plans for March?

I started being very negative. However as time goes by I started seeing the positive sides of things thanks to the support of my faith, family and friends. I have always been very active for 26 years, and for once I am sick and that’s OK! Of course I would rather be healthy but I see it as a time for me to slow down and reflect on what I have done all these years. It is also a time for me to be humble, that sometimes I need to surrender and let other people in and help me.

I still like to think myself as a strong, independent woman. I need to still be strong for the recovery plan my doctors have in plan for me. They will be hard and sometimes painful but you know, take it light, don’t think about it…though maybe I’ll let out a few tears! And still I need to be independent in the midst of being dependent to others. I learned that it is impossible for others to encourage me while I don’t make the effort myself and for this I need to push myself independently to get healthier faster.

And what about travelling? Well, for once I have no plans to travel this year and I don’t expect myself to go anywhere either until I get completely healthy. I will however still be blogging my past travels and I do still have a lot of stories to tell. I see myself as a travel blogger on a break – we all need one sometimes right?

While I might not post as regularly as usual, I am still active on Instagram, sharing you some of my travel and food pictures. Also this is a great time for me to share posts from my fellow travel blogger friends via my Twitter and Facebook  (yes I am still promoting myself shamelessly here!).

Anyway, this is not a pity post but just a post to say “HELLO! I’m still here, I’m taking a little break but I will stick around” 😀

27 Comment

  1. Speedy recovery, Aggy!
    I really miss having you around the blogosphere. I’ll try to arrange some days to visit you in Jogja yaaaaa *hugs*

    1. Thank you Deb! I’m still around kok, can’t get rid off me that easily hihi

  2. Kak aggy 🙁 🙁 🙁 Cepet sembuh yaaaa. Be strong!!!!! Ditunggu cerita jalan2nya nanti.

    1. Hi Sharon! Iya donk harus cepet sembuh biar bisa jalan2 lagi 🙂 makasi yaaaa

  3. Lekas pulih, Gy! Pokoknya istirahat dulu yang berkualitas, gak usah mikir macem2.. We’re still around you 🙂 #bighug

    1. Thanks Badai! Iya banyak istirahat pastinya, happy to have support from you all!

  4. Aggy! *hug* It’s true. Your family and friends can only do so much to help you but ultimately you have to pull yourself together. I am really happy that you have start seeing the positive side of things.

    Things may get tougher, it may not but I know you are prepared for it and you have a awesome support system from your family and friends.

    Wishing you speedy recovery! 😀

    1. It is really a turning point for me this illness! Yes my family and friends can only do so much but at the end it is me that have to be strong and pull myself together! Thanks for friends like you too who keeps me encouraged 😉

  5. Aggy, I can’t even begin to imagine how difficult it must be for you.

    To me, you will always be the bubbly, passionate, strong and independent woman I have grown to know and cherish. I know for sure that your sickness does not define you – you are stronger than you know. I wish you a speedy recovery and look forward to continued chats with you on FB 😉

    Welcome back to blog land. You have been missed.

    1. Can’t deny that it has been really hard Kavitha, but it is a life lesson right? Sometimes we do have to go through something like this to appreciate life! Thank you that you have been there to listen to my ramble, I’m really glad for that 🙂 and of course I will be blogging more, these fingers can’t help it haha!

  6. Aw, bless you xxx. I’m so sorry to hear that you’ve not had the best of times. Positive thinking can do wonders can’t it, you are strong! I hope you get through your recovery with strength.

    1. Yes Rachel it is being positive that I need right now 🙂
      Thanks for your words and I will keep strong for sure!

  7. Aggy, yes I have been wondering where have you been. Oh my God I didn’t know that you were sick (:

    Get well soon Aggy, and be strong.

    1. Hehe yes kak, it wasn’t something I wanted to share until I was at least a little bit better 😉
      Thank you kak for your support!

  8. Aggy, like the others I was also wondering of your whereabouts — that means everyone misses you! So stay positive, one step of recovery at a time, and don’t forget to eat well and rest well. Get well soon!

    1. Thanks Bama! I am always thankful for friends like yourself (although we haven’t yet met offline…that’s gotta change as soon as I get better!) and it is these encouragements that keeps me positive!

  9. So sorry to hear all this! When I asked you have you’ve been, I thought you were feeling better, but then I hadn’t heard from you again and I was worried 🙁 I hope you get well soon! Don’t worry about not traveling, the world will still be there, focus on getting healthy, that’s the most important thing! 🙂

    1. Hey Vlad! You are totally right! The world is still there and it won’t go anywhere 🙂
      Thank you for your concern, I shall be up and healthy again in no time don’t worry and the blog will have stories of my past travels – can’t give up blogging that easily 😀

  10. I just hate being sick on the road :((((((((( It spoils everything what I usually plan!

    1. Very true so I guess it’s *kinda* a good thing that I am sick at home with my family to take care of me. Can’t imagine being this sick in a foreign country by myself, would’ve been super hard for me to handle 😉

  11. I was thinking I hadn’t seen you around much lately! I can’t imagine how scary this must have been for you. I feel exactly the same way about hospitals and doctors! It sounds like you’re on the road to recovery now though, so keep being the strong woman I know you are, get better soon, and know that we’re all cheering for you! 🙂

    1. Hi Jenny! Thanks a lot for your supportive words! I hope to be back healthy soon, it really helps that I have a positive surrounding 🙂

  12. Get better soon … take all the time you need. Health should be your #1 priority!

    1. Thanks Meghan! Yes health is definitely the most important thing in the world!

  13. Glad to see you overcame that period of illness … and yes, needles are the worst man!

    1. Thanks Meghan! 🙂

  14. […] felt better, I felt confident and even positive. I even wrote a blog post about being sick but very positive about my […]

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